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Gungan to the left

Long Way Down (G)

By : Blazer

Archived on: Monday, May 31, 2004

In the Jedi Purges, a young intiate remembers the fallen of before.

It's a long way down.

First of all, there's a Light Side and Dark Side. Understand? Good. Those are the only things that need to be known. Besides, everyone knows about the Dark and Light. The Light is the good side; the Dark is the bad side. I know it. Everyone knows it.

Anyway, that's not even important. The important thing is there's a tunnel, understand? There's a tunnel between the Light and the Dark. It's a solid thing. Even though the Dark and the Light aren't solid, it's there. It's an invisible solid tube. I can still see it in my mind, the clear connecting transparent tube between the Dark and the Light. The Light is on top, understand? Because the Light is good, and the Dark is bad, and good things are supposed to be first.

It's a long way down, from the Light to the Dark. It's supposed to be that way. A Jedi isn't supposed to be able to fall all the way down the tunnel, from the top to the bottom, because it's such a long way. And there are handholds along the tunnel, too, to catch yourself. You can always stop yourself from falling all the way down. The tunnel was built that way, to stop from falling.

But that doesn't make sense, because people have fallen. Now, I don't understand how a long tunnel full of handholds can allow people to fall to the Dark. The Masters say you can always stop yourself, but I know people have fallen. Vader fell down the tunnel. Why didn't he stop himself? The tunnel is full of handholds. You should be able to.

Maybe he just didn't reach out a hand, didn't reach for the handholds. Those handholds are supposed to be gravel and solid, easy to grip with fingers. That's what the Masters say. You can always stop yourself. Why didn't he? The tunnel is supposed to be really long, isn't it? That's enough time to get your bearing and reach out a hand. Why didn't he?

I wonder where the tunnel is. I heard the Masters whispering about Vader falling on someplace called Geonosis. I saw Master Kenobi come back, clutching his burned arm. Maybe the place is a land of fire. Where else could he get burned? Maybe the tunnel is in a land of fire, where it's harder to get to, so you can't fall. Why was Vader so determined to get to the tunnel? It probably meant he had to go through the land of fire. Surely it hurt. Surely Master Kenobi tried to stop him.

Master Kenobi was Anakin Skywalker's Master, but Anakin doesn't come by here anymore. I don't see him wandering around camp. But then again, maybe he can't find the camp. We move so much now. I get tired of it all. I like being in one place. Maybe then Anakin will find us. He was my friend when the Wars started. He liked coming to the Clan room and tinkering with our little lightsabers. He liked mine, he said, because it was purple. He said he valued individuality, because he was in a place where everything was tan and cream and blue and green.

Whatever that means.

I didn't understand him then, and I still don't. But he liked me best. He liked coming to talk to me and tell me stories of a beautiful woman in a faraway land. Whenever he was in the Temple, he told me stories about her, about the mysterious woman who saved her people. He seemed different then. More relaxed. The war took a lot from him, from everyone. Nobody liked the war. I don't even know why it's going on. War is so stupid. You can stop everything with a word, but they all like to fight. I don't know why. It made Anakin sad, and he was different when he was sad.

But he still liked me best, and that never changed. When he stopped visiting, I asked Master Kenobi where he was, and he just muttered something about falling and Geonosis. I didn't know about the tunnel then. When the Masters spoke of it a few weeks later, I understood: Anakin had fallen down the tunnel, but he would be back. He just had to fall for a little while.

You can't fall all the way down the tunnel. You can grab the handholds. You can stop yourself from falling into the Dark.

That was before, though. Before they raided the Temple. I saw Vader, and I hated him. But I wasn't supposed to, understand? A Jedi isn't supposed to hate, right? But I did. He was dressed in black, and I knew it: he had hurt Anakin. I knew it just by looking at him, and the Force encouraged me. I wanted to yell at him, but Master Yoda ushered us away.

I didn't know they were killing everyone in the Temple. I didn't realize they were massacring every living thing inside. So many died, and I knew all of them. The Masters urge understanding between everything, a family bond between all. I knew them through that, and I hated feeling their deaths through the Force, echoing so loudly in my head it could have been a drum.

I don't like thinking about that now. I don't like thinking about Vader or the tunnel. Vader fell down the tunnel without trying to stop himself. How can you do that? How can you not just stop yourself from sliding down it? I don't understand it, I don't! It's supposed to have handholds and it's supposed to be long. You're supposed to be able to stop yourself.

Why didn't he stop himself?

I don't understand.

I want to see the tunnel one day, and make sure the Masters aren't lying. I want to see the handholds and see the fact that it's long. It's supposed to be transparent, but I should see it through the Force. The Masters say you can see anything through the Force.

It's supposed to be a long way down that tunnel.

I guess it's not long enough.

Original cover by obaona. HTML formatting copyright 2004 TheForce.Net LLC.

Fan Fiction Rating

Current Rating is 8.55 in 69 total ratings.

Reader Comments

Add a comment about this Fan Fiction

Author: Miss Rainstorm  (signed)
Date posted: 6/1/2004 11:55:27 AM
Miss Rainstorm's Comments:

Brilliant! Absolutely brilliant. It was very short, but that didn't detract from the story at all. Wonderful insight about Vader falling, I absolutely loved the tunnel idea. My only question is who was telling the story? It's powerfull being anonymous, but it does leave you wondering.

Once again, well done! More, more, more!

Author: Lord Maul
Date posted: 6/3/2004 5:39:34 PM
Lord Maul's Comments:

Wow. That is quite possibly the best fanfic I've read in months. I loved how you put a physical connection between the light and dark side. Very, very cool. I gave it a 10/10. The only problem I found was that Anakin falls on Mustafar, not Geonosis. Mustafar is like this volcanic planet. But hey, that's why its called fanFICTION. We can't get picky. If you think he fell on Geonosis, then he fell on Geonosis.

I totally agree with Miss Rainstorm. YOU. MUST. WRITE. MORE! ;-)

Author: a fan of fanfics
Date posted: 6/3/2004 6:19:19 PM
a fan of fanfics's Comments:

i thought it was wonderful
very insightful
i think what u might have meant about falling on geonosis is how he lost his sanity i guess u could say there and he did lose his arm there

Author: Griffin
Date posted: 6/3/2004 11:33:37 PM
Griffin's Comments:

I didn't find it very good. The flow-of-consciousness style is a great one--but hard to pull off. Try for a more emotionally-charged piece next time.

-The first line was a good hook.
-The next two paragraphs were painful, and didn't flow well with the rest of the story. They should be removed, replaced with a follow of the hook using another "I wonder" or "why?!" paragraph. Then take the information in there and weave it into the first 2 to 5 paragraphs.
-The problem people are having with identity is that the story changes voice constantly. It seems at times to be writen from the viewpoint of a very small child, yet the background information (being approximately the same age as Anakin) and some of the text suggests someone in his/her 20s. Having a child as the narrator is GOOD--it adds emotional clarity and ease of writing. Instead of making it seem more adult, simply add and remove details and background until the character seems to be a child.
-The last two lines were great.

I hope I have been of help.

Author: Lady_Vader
Date posted: 6/4/2004 12:20:34 AM
Lady_Vader's Comments:

I liked it alot :) i thought it was really well written and I also think you should keeo writing, great job keep it up hehe!

P.S. Hey Griffen dude, if you come back... Wanna Beta read for me lol jk :) but you would be good at it (: hehe

Author: obaona  (signed)
Date posted: 6/4/2004 5:46:37 PM
obaona's Comments:

I really liked this, Kryste. I definitely found it a little odd the first time I read it, but in a good way. ;) I also think it's interesting how you have that strange mix of adult and child-like thoughts. I imagine Jedi children really would be that way, because of the way they're raised - still children, but expected to act like adults in many ways.

Anyway. This is lovely. :)

Author: Sparta
Date posted: 6/5/2004 7:45:21 PM
Sparta's Comments:

Actually, Anakin begins the fall on Tatooine when he kills all the sandpeople.

Author: Blazer  (signed)
Date posted: 6/5/2004 8:07:10 PM
Blazer's Comments:

Firstly, my greatest thanks go to my two beta readers, Miana Kenobi and my sister Jerikor. Thank you both so much for looking this over for me. I can't believe it got in on the first try. Secondly, thank you to obaona, who did the cover art. It's beautiful, oba!

And thirdly, thanks for the comments, guy. To Griffen, although I don't agree with some of your comments, I thank you for taking the time to give such a wonderful review. :)

Ack! Spoiler! *covers ear* I am spoiler-free, and shall remain that way. The thought of Anakin falling on Geonosis is my choosing. He's fallen there in another fanfiction of mine as well.

And thank you again!

Author: solojones  (signed)
Date posted: 7/17/2004 11:40:07 AM
solojones's Comments:

For what it's worth, I thought it was brilliant and gave it a 10! This is one of the best child perspective stories I've read. I think they're hard to do, but this one's great. The way the narrator keeps trying to reason with himself using the metaphorical tunnel the Masters have taught him is great. It's clear this person isn't old enough to understand what literally happened, and it was heartbreaking to hear the story through the eyes of a child who's lost a friend and doesn't know why his friend can't come back. I really loved this piece!

Author: Healer_Leona
Date posted: 10/23/2007 2:48:00 PM
Healer_Leona's Comments:

Very poignant viggie, powerful as well.

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Archived: Monday, May 31, 2004

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