Author: Jedi_Author
Date posted: 5/6/2003 12:00:15 PM
Jedi_Author's Comments:

I'd probably give this story four stars because the characterisation is spot on!!! Mara and Luke's colourful banter and the brief scenes that portray Kyp Durron are brilliant. A fine piece of work to be proud of.

Author: obaona  (signed)
Date posted: 5/7/2003 1:59:15 AM
obaona's Comments:

I was one of the people that reviewed this story, and I totally loved it. It had plenty of action, was fast-moving with an original and intense plot, and had a good amount of romance to balance it out. I liked how the characters were developed, and became totally engrossed in the storyline. This truly read like a novel to me.

Absolutely wonderful job, Niralle. This story is quite an accomplishment. :)

Author: bundy397
Date posted: 5/7/2003 12:57:25 PM
bundy397's Comments:

Loved the story. Very good characterizations! I liked the fast pace and action packed chapters. I was actually suprised to see that you did not make a connection with Xizor to one of the Fallen but that would be too convienient a plot point. Great job.

Author: bundy397
Date posted: 5/7/2003 12:57:38 PM
bundy397's Comments:

Loved the story. Very good characterizations! I liked the fast pace and action packed chapters. I was actually suprised to see that you did not make a connection with Xizor to one of the Fallen but that would be too convienient a plot point. Great job.

Author: Jedi-2B  (signed)
Date posted: 5/9/2003 10:58:29 AM
Jedi-2B's Comments:

I read this story awhile back, and it remains one of my favorites. The characterizations are excellent, and it gives us a wonderful portrayal of how others in the galaxy view the Jedi.

I would say that this story is on a caliber with the officials novels, but actually, I think it's much better than most of the pro- work that is published.

Author: Niralle  (signed)
Date posted: 5/9/2003 12:43:29 PM
Niralle's Comments:

Hello everyone. I just wanted to say thank you to everyone for their nice comments...really nice comments. Thank you all so much!

Author: MoriahthePariah
Date posted: 5/12/2003 9:22:17 AM
MoriahthePariah's Comments:

This is one of the most intense stories I've read, counting the official published books. The action was terrific and well-paced; you did a superb job keeping the scenes from becoming confusing. What I enjoyed even more than the heart-pounding combat and intrigue was your treatment of Luke--it was better than what the NJO authors have done with him. Here he was an incredible warrior, not only in combat but in his resiliency. He was incredibly strong and confident, but nevertheless vulnerable and selfless. One of the best characterizations of the older Luke I've seen yet.

Author: X-Wing Ace  (signed)
Date posted: 5/13/2003 5:03:48 PM
X-Wing Ace's Comments:

Definitely well-written and enjoyable. Keep up the bleeding good work!

Author: Sash
Date posted: 5/29/2003 9:33:42 AM
Sash's Comments:

one of the best fics i have read... all the characters were portrayed perfectly. I loved the banter between mara and luke. A lovely fic which gave me over two hours of great reading.

Author: obgynobi
Date posted: 6/12/2003 11:24:05 AM
obgynobi's Comments:

This story was great, however, the spelling and grammar mistakes were rampant through the whole thing. Don't get me wrong. I loved the story and the characters, but it would be so much more professional if the grammar and spelling were correct. Good job.

Author: Thanatos
Date posted: 6/21/2003 12:45:16 AM
Thanatos's Comments:

I'm a little disappointed in this one. Good characterization of the principles, great elaboration of the Falleen species and individual Falleen characterization. The story idea and plot were good, but it lacked something in the writing. Certain words were overused throughout, and duplicated in the same short sentence multiple times. Certain elements felt forced and far too contrived. Some interaction caused characters to act contrary to overall persona of that character. The writing of the dialogue was good and the development of the orginal character Pace was also good. All in all, I think it culd have used more development and editing and a whole lot more description of surroundings, moods, and elaboration of character responses. All that being said, I can't say that it was bad. Again, the story idea itself was wonderfully created, just the writing was somewhat poorly crafted.

Author: Niralle  (signed)
Date posted: 7/18/2003 9:51:07 PM
Niralle's Comments:

Hey, everyone. I just wanted to thank you guys/girls for your comments, (again), including honest and caring criticism.

I appreciate feedback from readers, whether here or via my e-mail address. I do really want to know what you thought of my story, but if you feel more comfortable by sending it to my e-mail, that works as well.

I'm an English major, attempting to improve my writing skills. On one aspect, I do love positive reviews and not so much negative ones, but if you have something to say, send it to my e-mail address if you're concerned about putting up a not-so happy review.

Even if you have just one-sentence comments, that's fine, too. Just as long as it's not, "oh, that reeked," with no explanation.

I realize my spelling skills aren't top notch, (English major with poor spelling skills--where are all the flying pigs?), so I apologize for that. Hopefully, with time, I'll catch the errors more accurately. Oh, where's a Delrey editor when you need one!

Just playing.

So, if you want, send me comments via-email, or place them here if you feel comfortable. Please don't put up spoilers, or nitpick at one or two scenes here...you can send those to my yahoo address, though--I'll read them. I promise not to display any privately obtained comments without your permission.

Thanks to all!
Niralle :)

Author: Robin_Phoenix V  (signed)
Date posted: 8/22/2003 9:23:06 AM
Robin_Phoenix V's Comments:

Great story! I'd like these kinda of stories. I also like stories with those Falleen's they are mistiqal. Great story!!!

Author: Gabri_Jade  (signed)
Date posted: 11/16/2003 10:19:51 PM
Gabri_Jade's Comments:

Fascinating story, Niralle. The plot is unique, there's a good balance between action and romance, and the characterization is very accurate, especially with Luke and Mara. Their conversations with each other are a joy to read. Very well done!

Author: jacen200015  (signed)
Date posted: 11/12/2004 7:38:31 PM
jacen200015's Comments:

A great read. unfortanutly i actually need to read it again because i don't remeber if i read the whole fic through. However what i have read is great, perfect. I didn't see anything wrong that needed correcting. :) Awesome fic. I'll make sure that i have read the whole thing as time allows. Do you have any other fics that i could read?

Author: Mark  (signed)
Date posted: 3/18/2005 10:28:16 AM
Mark's Comments:

This was just great. Everything that was depicted here was spot on. Too bad Pace had to die. Luke and Mara were great in this story and so was everyone else. I really enjoyed it.

Author: video gambling
Date posted: 5/7/2005 4:20:33 PM
video gambling's Comments:

Spam removed.

Author: Shuro
Date posted: 3/14/2007 1:48:02 PM
Shuro's Comments:

well done i like it.....does everybody hate kyp durron? (i just started reading the actual books so i wouldnt know what he's like) i have read a couple others were hes ummmm... not quite jedi.....i dont know how to explain it....

Author: Kneazlegirl
Date posted: 9/22/2008 11:48:36 AM
Kneazlegirl's Comments:

Wow! This is excellent! I almost forgot that I was reading a fanfic and not an "official" Star Wars novel.

Author: Krysta
Date posted: 5/19/2011 12:14:09 PM
Krysta's Comments:

Niralle -

Wonderful story! I did detect some gramatical errors a few times throughout the story, but it didn't ruin anything. :)

You should really think about getting your work published! You are such a talented writer! You portrayed all of the characters to a tee and it was never boring, unlike some of the official novels that are out there in bookstores.

I'll be looking for more of your work on TheForce.net. This was a superb read! Thank you for making my work day go just a little faster!

Author: Jorja
Date posted: 1/16/2016 1:49:41 AM
Jorja's Comments:

I hate my life but at least this makes it beraebla.