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Gungan to the left


Reader Comments on "Secrets Unveiled"

Add a comment about this Fan Fiction

Author: matt
Date posted: 5/27/2003 8:09:47 AM
matt's Comments:

i really enjoyed this story, and must admit thought someone had gotten hold of the script for star wars III, early as it work so well between the films. I've been reading these posted storys for sometime now and this is the firt time i felt the need to write a comment, brillently written please keep them coming whoever you are. And having read most the pre and post comisioned books, i think they should come and check you out as this was a good as some of the best i've read

Author: Andrea Jade  (signed)
Date posted: 5/27/2003 8:26:30 AM
Andrea Jade's Comments:

Fabulous! A perfect understanding how the past and present can meld and grow. Obi Wan as a man is able to rise above the hurts of his past and understand them. Letting go and extending the hand of friendship, how wonderful.

Author: Sita
Date posted: 5/27/2003 11:30:33 AM
Sita's Comments:

This story was wonderful. I'm trying to jump-start two Anakin/Obi-wan stories myself right now, and this story was just what I needed to help me get into Obi-wan's head. Thank you so much for this wonderful glimpse into the mind of an amazing heart. I do love that Kenobi!

-Sita

Author: Darth Breezy  (signed)
Date posted: 5/27/2003 1:58:26 PM
Darth Breezy's Comments:

Another rich and wonderful contribution to the archives... It is a level of storytelling mayn stive fro but so few achive... Wonderful.

Author: Legendre
Date posted: 5/28/2003 1:41:03 PM
Legendre's Comments:

I really enjoyed the characterization of Yoda. He's become too much of the fortune-cookie guy in the latest movies, and not enough of the stern taskmaster.

An excellent effort.

-Legendre

Author: Legendre
Date posted: 5/28/2003 1:41:09 PM
Legendre's Comments:

I really enjoyed the characterization of Yoda. He's become too much of the fortune-cookie guy in the latest movies, and not enough of the stern taskmaster.

An excellent effort.

-Legendre

Author: Niki  (signed)
Date posted: 5/28/2003 7:03:44 PM
Niki's Comments:

Wow...I'm at a loss for words. That story was fabulous. Thank you for writing it!

Author: Jedi_Alea  (signed)
Date posted: 5/29/2003 8:41:21 AM
Jedi_Alea's Comments:

I found both "Secrets" and "Secrets Unveiled" to be amazing stories! You're characterizations, plots, and the flow of your writing in each chapter and scene were all high quality work in my opinion. This rates right up there with some of my favorite EU stories!

Author: Lyra Luminara
Date posted: 5/29/2003 1:41:15 PM
Lyra Luminara's Comments:

I love how you brought ino this story things and elements from 'the approaching storm', I love that book so much. In the book I did sense <i>something</i> between luminara and obi-wan.hehe.

Author: ObiOne
Date posted: 5/30/2003 9:45:53 AM
ObiOne's Comments:

Interesting plot. I thought your primary plot of Obi Wan coming to terms with himself was strong. The Anakin/Padme plot line did not convince me. I do not think that the council will know about Padme/Anakin until Epid III. Also, in Ep II we saw Anakin as a rebelous teenager . . . I would think that we would see more of Anakin coming to the point between Ep.II and Ep.III where he no longer feels he needs Obi Wan's approval . . . that Anakin's feelings of superiority will take over. That will be a critical choice that Anakin will make in going over to the dark side. You touched on it beautifully here, that one must choose the path one walks and Anakin will reject the path of obedience.
Guess I am saying overall I enjoyed it, but Anakin could have been developed more so we see that it is his maturing choices that lead him to the dark side. Overall, nicely done, enjoyable to read.

Author: Thomas
Date posted: 5/30/2003 11:33:15 AM
Thomas's Comments:

I don't buy that Obi-Wan would ever do anything to betray Qui-Gon or find himself in a situation where he would need to be "forgiven" as Anakin is. The only reason the author invented that scenario was to create a situation where Obi-Wan would want to forgive his Padawan in turn. The ending does not sit right with me. I just do not find it credible that Obi-Wan's hurt and sense of betrayal by Anakin (and Padme) would be forgiven so easily. Otherwise, the story is excellent. I found it to be well written and the interaction/discussions between the characters were intriguing.

Author: inis
Date posted: 5/30/2003 5:20:29 PM
inis's Comments:

this was a terrific story. was that all of it or is there more. i would like there to be more. i really loved the part about knowing more about obi-wan's master and how obi-wan also falls in love. i can't wait to see the movie. i think it's going to be better then any star wars movie, the best if they add the thing about obi-wan loving someone.

Author: Pmochizuki
Date posted: 5/30/2003 9:55:54 PM
Pmochizuki's Comments:

Quiller, this is a TERRIFIC story! I absolutely loved "Secrets", now "Secrets Unveiled" is another of my favorite Star Wars fanfics. Obi-Wan's characterization was done incredibly, you've written him exactly as the Obi-Wan we Obi-Wan fans know and love. Thanks so much! Very much looking forward to a sequel (hint hint!)

Author: puke moonwalker2
Date posted: 5/31/2003 9:03:06 PM
puke moonwalker2's Comments:

Interesting story line a bit wish washy in some places. Graet lead on to episode 3 possibly thanks a lot for putting this on for everyone to look at.

Thanx

Author: Jedi_Author
Date posted: 6/1/2003 5:33:57 AM
Jedi_Author's Comments:

a brilliant plotline (though in secrets i didnt like obi-wan's charecterization). i like the way you expanded luminara and obi-wan's relationship. but just one thing: barriss offee, luminara's padawan, didnt die, and will be the main character in the Medstar Duology.

Author: ert
Date posted: 6/2/2003 1:36:15 AM
ert's Comments:

I usually avoid fanfic but in this case I am very pleased that I didn't. Beautifully characterized, with the perfect balance between introspection and action - and skillfully written to boot. My congratulations and appreciation!

Author: Tracy721
Date posted: 6/2/2003 6:01:10 PM
Tracy721's Comments:

The story was very good!
I also thought this had to be episode three material. It was written so well

Author: master marktuw
Date posted: 6/3/2003 9:31:50 AM
master marktuw's Comments:

This was an exceptionally written fan fic. Truely a work of art. I have read every star wars book and most of the comics, your characterization of all characters was acurate and believable.

Author: X-Wing Ace
Date posted: 6/5/2003 10:47:56 AM
X-Wing Ace's Comments:

Well-written and enjoyable.

Keep it up!

Author: darth_nubian
Date posted: 6/5/2003 10:55:59 AM
darth_nubian's Comments:

Awesome!

Author: padme867
Date posted: 6/6/2003 10:50:30 PM
padme867's Comments:

out of every story i' have read on this site (whiach is alot) this is the best.

Author: darthnikita
Date posted: 6/7/2003 9:44:35 AM
darthnikita's Comments:

i really did love this story. it was written well, and stayed true to the characters. i know this is minor, but it bugged me nevertheless. i was really kind of disappointed when padme' fainted after her blaster wounds. she just seems a lot more hard-edged than that. that's just my personal opinion though and shouldn't ruin the fact that i loved the story. it was enchanting. good job.

Author: Ani
Date posted: 6/18/2003 6:38:21 AM
Ani's Comments:

This has to be one of the best stories I've read. I really liked how you showed in-depth the relationship between Anakin,Padme and Obi-Wan. I would like to see parts of this in Eps.3

Author: Elextron
Date posted: 6/20/2003 9:34:42 PM
Elextron's Comments:

A masterpeice. I printed the whole thing off to read for bed and it made a spectacular short story, and I completely forgot about 1/4 through that i was reading amature ficture. Bravo!

Author: mikeyb65
Date posted: 6/29/2003 10:59:16 AM
mikeyb65's Comments:

this was a very well written story. I agree with the others that say this is very professional writting. I really like the flow of this story. I can't remember a single place where the storyline got bogged down or stalled. Again this is excellent writting and I hope to see mork work from this author soon

Author: mikeyb65
Date posted: 6/29/2003 10:59:18 AM
mikeyb65's Comments:

this was a very well written story. I agree with the others that say this is very professional writting. I really like the flow of this story. I can't remember a single place where the storyline got bogged down or stalled. Again this is excellent writting and I hope to see mork work from this author soon

Author: anakinskywalker9-19  (signed)
Date posted: 7/30/2003 9:47:49 AM
anakinskywalker9-19's Comments:

Great story i spent an 1 1/2 hours reading it but it was great.

Author: Leia_1991
Date posted: 8/5/2003 9:32:41 AM
Leia_1991's Comments:

It was good exept for all the taking I really liked the epaloge

Author: kellis
Date posted: 8/10/2003 2:13:26 PM
kellis's Comments:

Lucas won't write anything so good. Absolutely EXCELLENT charater writing--you should do it for a living. And that's not a 13 year old kid speaking--my PhD is in literature.

Author: dedegordon  (signed)
Date posted: 8/20/2003 8:25:48 PM
dedegordon's Comments:

George Lucas, is that you? Seriously, breathtaking is the one word that I can come up with to describe your talent. Please never stop creating.

Author: Senator Skywalker
Date posted: 10/7/2003 4:38:39 AM
Senator Skywalker's Comments:

I am in absolute awe. This has to be the BEST piece I have read so far. I loved the way it was written and the way it showed the different characters and their perception of the situation. Truly incredible!! I also thought it excellent the way you described Anakin and Padme's relationship--which I loved so much in the film, you wrote it exceptionally well.
What I found the best reading, were the small interactions between Obi-Wan and Padme. I had always hoped for that kind of friendship to be portrayed in the films. I must agree with the others--you're insight with Obi-Wan Kenobi was brilliant!! Overall, I must say I LOVED reading your story (although I hadn't read the prequel to it, I will try and find it now)and hope you will continue to write. Your story was very descriptive and very satisfying--thank you.

Author: leia__naberrie
Date posted: 12/1/2003 12:30:57 AM
leia__naberrie's Comments:

The sequel definitely appeals to me more than 'Secrets'. I still have some pet peeves with Padme's depiction here - I don't think she'd ever permit anyone to dictate to her the way Obi-Wan did in this story - and her constant need for his approval is also, to me, out of character. And, even though it's debatable, I agree that a woman who kept going after being maimed by a nexu should have more resilience to blaster wounds.
You definitely nailed Anakin's character and his relationship with Obi-Wan; Dooku was drawn very well - classy, scheming villian, a shade one-dimensional but I'm not a fan so who cares? And using the Melida/Daan story from the JA was inspired. The parallels drawn between the 2 kinds of betrayal was interesting.

Author: Dawn
Date posted: 12/25/2003 9:57:00 PM
Dawn's Comments:

That was a great story, you may want to give Lucas a few tips. i agree with the person who said that it looked like you had found the script to Eps 3. your a great writer Keep it up

Author: MutantJediBouer
Date posted: 1/29/2004 3:35:15 PM
MutantJediBouer's Comments:

WOW. That was amazing. Obi-Wan is my favorite character so I am worried sometimes that people will mess him up but you did a truly fantastic job. I love the way you added parts from the Jedi Apprentice series, stroke of genius. Anakins relationship with Padme was greatly defined and as was his relationship with his master. Padme seemed a little timid but other than that was awesome as well. I agree with the others, this seems like an Ep 3 script, if the script is anywhere near the caliber this is, it will be the best movie of them all.

MTFBWY
MutantJediBouer
aka. Zax-Ryn Kenobi

Author: Jeff 42  (signed)
Date posted: 2/22/2004 1:44:49 PM
Jeff 42's Comments:

I finally got around to reading this story, and I must say I feel rather silly for not reading it sooner. Beautifully written, and you do such a great job of writing Anakin, Padme, and Obi-Wan as complex human beings. Your portrayal of Obi-Wan was especially well done, as usual. The epilogue, where Obi-Wan extends the offer of friendship, really hit me on a deep emotional level. Reading this story was not only a great experience in and of itself, but it also heightens my anticipation for Episode III!

Author: MutantJediBouer  (signed)
Date posted: 4/8/2004 11:27:15 PM
MutantJediBouer's Comments:

Again, I love your stories. So good I just had to come back and read them again. What is particularly amusing to me is that I just read those books from the Jedi Apprentice series. The ones about Melida/Daan and Obi-Wan's betrayal. I still have them from the library. Anyway, still a truly amazing story. I'm waiting on the archive to be updated so see if you've added any more. Odd, though, that it hasn't yet, TF.n is usually very prompt about updating it. Oh well...
MutantJediBauer (It's spelled wrong in my nickname)
aka. Zax-Ryn Kenobi

Author: Freddy
Date posted: 8/7/2004 5:55:24 PM
Freddy's Comments:

This story is GREAT!!!! I love it! You should have it made into a real book.

Author: swlover4life12  (signed)
Date posted: 8/27/2004 4:20:55 PM
swlover4life12's Comments:

i love this storey

Author: margo
Date posted: 1/25/2005 1:41:48 PM
margo's Comments:

AWESOME!!! Really good piece of writing. LUMINARA ROCKS!!! Best star wars fic i've ever read. margo :-D

Author: Kenobi-12
Date posted: 4/4/2005 1:29:29 PM
Kenobi-12's Comments:

Awesome! This is a great piece of writing!

Author: Llewellyn
Date posted: 4/8/2005 2:17:01 PM
Llewellyn's Comments:

Just want to say thank you. Wonderful story, interesting plot and the characterization is brilliant, though the second part is less impressive because of the ending: I can't believe the Counsel will act that way. But Secrets is a marvel. I've found it a year ago and was reading it all night through the day before the exam. Well, who cares about linguistics? :) The tension between Padme and Obi-Wan... Masterpiece. I was amazed. I don't write fanfics myself but I usually help a friend of mine, 'cause she always has troubles with Obi-Wan and for me it was always easy to get into his head. Funny 'cause your vision of Obi-Wan is similar to mine. George really really should have rather filmed or printed your work, it's far more talented than many of the official books. A few mistakes are nothing as compare with the whole story. I'm longing for making the translation into Russian. I hope you won't be offended if some day (a very distant day, I must say) I do it. Thanx again.

Author: Laura Skywalker  (signed)
Date posted: 5/7/2005 11:28:46 AM
Laura Skywalker's Comments:

Absolutely amazing. I love the little Luminara-Obi-Wan bit, and I think that was a really sweet way to give Obi-Wan a personality. Meaning, Obi-Wan seems heartless a lot, but you showed that he has to face the same temptations Anakin does. Thank you.

Author: Freddy
Date posted: 8/31/2005 3:31:48 PM
Freddy's Comments:

Um... this was ok, good mission. In Secrets and Secrets Unveiled, you really made it border Obidala. You made it seem that Anakin was completely forgottena nd Padme only loved his love for her. But otherwise good story. I personally dont like the Obi-wan/Padme stuff you write, but thats my own opinion. And i know this was written before episode2 where the triangle of Obi-Wan/Padme/Anakin was straightened to reveal Ani/Ami so their characters kinda seem out of place. But again, greatd escriptiona nd story.

Author: silversaber kylekatarn
Date posted: 9/27/2005 6:21:43 AM
silversaber kylekatarn's Comments:

Excellent story. Nice touches of humor. Obi Wan is portrayed brilliantly. But master Yoda would never admonish or dismiss Kenobi like he did on several occasions in this story. He esteems him too much for that.

Author: LuminaraFan
Date posted: 8/9/2006 2:19:23 PM
LuminaraFan's Comments:

I loved it!It was so cool. I think it wasn't very realistic though. Luminara in the official stories is obsessed with her job. But I think its sweet that she wants him to kiss her.

Author: TheOneAndOnlyBarriss
Date posted: 8/14/2006 6:11:58 PM
TheOneAndOnlyBarriss's Comments:

I know a lot of people have told you that you're wrong about Barriss being dead, and it's true. But I can't stand it when someone tells someone something is wrong with a story and doesn't offer a way to fix it. So this is what I came up with. After a LOT of online research (this was beginning to bother me) I discovered that Barriss was shot and injured at the Battle Of Geonosis. She was picked up, unconscious, by another injured jedi, Pablo-Jill, who had just passed out from a slight injury. She was taken to a medcenter, and revcovered, but she was believed dead for a long time.

Author: Tonis  (signed)
Date posted: 9/23/2008 5:28:38 AM
Tonis's Comments:

I had so much to say about this story, but now it escapes me! So you'll have to do with this.
This is easily the best written fan fiction i have read in the last few years. Your level of writing is simply beyond most, i do hope you go after a career in writing, just so i can snatch up and read whatever else you write! Thank you for this fic, was an absolute pleasure reading it!


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